You are away this weekend and I am home alone. I cannot find the tool box, a hammer or a nail any sturdier than a thumbtack. Have you hidden these things from me on purpose? I promise to use the stud finder and only make one hole. It will not be like the time I sorta undid the lamp, and you had to turn off the power and balance precariously on a stool, carefully threading it and re-wiring. No way. And not like the time I hung those drapes and didn't really really like 'em after all the time you spent expertly installing the curtain rods... I like them now though, so we're good? And, not like the time we had to repaint the living room after a couple of months. I told you, the old color was for staging. So babe, for realz, where's the hammer?
You're not still sore about those other things, right? I think if anything, it shows that you actually are a handy husband, you've had to get me out of some real scrapes. Okay, well guess I'll just keep looking. You boys have fun out there in the woods, I'll just keep myself plenty busy. Although, if I don't find the hammer soon, I might have to go to Target and get another one and we both know what happens at Target... On second thought, maybe I'd better just go ahead and go. It's never good to waste time searching for something, total waste of time. And we could always use a back up hammer. Yeah... Target... See you tomorrow night, honey!